Archive for the ‘Humourous’ Category
Thursday, May 13th, 2010
Obviously you can’t please all of the people all of the time, and we do get glasses returned to us because clients aren’t happy with them. Fortunately it’s a really tiny percentage, and often with a bit of adjustment or explanation the specs go back home and give many years of happy sight! The main problem that we have to contend with is the unrealistic expectations of the client. We wish we could perform miracles of Physics but sadly we can’t! So what are the main problems that we would solve if we were granted Super-Powers?!
The No-Effort Varifocal – Varifocals are wonderful lenses that give you back vision at all distances. They let you see near, far, and everywhere in between without swapping specs. The only drawback is that you so have to work with them, and compromise. You have to turn your head a little more to look to the side, you have to drop your chin slightly to see in the distance, and you have to get used to them when you first get them! Persevere, buy the best you can afford, and be grateful you don’t have to change glasses every time you try to focus at a different distance!
Wafer Thin Lenses – You can get lenses in thin material nowadays, but the higher your prescription, the more substance you have to your lens. You also get visible rings around the edges of the lens, which increase with stronger lenses. Brutal though it sounds, you have to be realistic. If your prescription is higher than minus 10 or plus 8, the strength is tricky to disguise. We can use the thinnest material possible, we can add coatings to reduce the rings, but your specs will never look as if there is no power there. Any optician who tells you otherwise is raising false hopes! So be thankful that you can reduce thickness by up to 60%, and be happy with the knowledge that lens materials are improving all the time, and we’ll do everything we can to make them look as good as possible for you.
Reading Specs That Focus Far Away – The magnifying power of your reading glasses is in inverse proportion to the focal length – in plain English, the more they magnify, the closer to your eye you’ll have to hold things! So for very fine detail you have to hold things close too, for bigger print you can have a weaker lens that focuses further away. If you need to see detail at near and far, you need to move yourself closer!
So there are our three wishes, if our Fairy-Godmother pops up any time soon, we’ll be as happy as our clients to get this little lot sorted!
Tags: glasses, lenses in thin material, Optician, reading glasses, specs, varifocals
Posted in Helpfull Info, Humourous | No Comments »
Sunday, March 7th, 2010
It’s an interesting fact that the mere sight of a studious looking girl in glasses makes most men go weak at the knees. That Librarian image of a good girl who might just turn out to be bad if you can persuade her to whip off her specs and shake loose her hair is an ever popular fantasy that has been used in photo shoots, film and possibly real life since specs wear began.
This week, even Barbie dolls get in the act, as Mattel launches a new version of the blonde bombshell, complete with laptop, Bluetooth earpiece, and geeky chunky specs. The new model was chosen by fans and is based on the personality of a computer engineer. So if you want to be taken seriously by your male colleagues, and use all the deadly weapons at your disposal, then the look for girls is clearly computer geek chic.
Women are taken more seriously in the workplace, and are likely to be more successful in interviews if they wear glasses. Something work appropriate and stylish is a heavyweight, dark and single colour plastic frame, with the minimum of embellishment and the maximum of blue stocking appeal. It will lend a fashion edge to your boring work suits, and is sturdy and practical for every day wear.
Chunky rim plastics are perfect for high prescriptions, as they disguise your lenses. If you just wear specs for reading they are wonderfully intimidating if you slide them down your nose and peer over the top edge! They are also great for varifocals as you can choose a shape that’s deeper, giving you plenty of room for your distance, reading, and middle distance prescriptions.
With your bold and eye catching Librarian specs in place you only need to add a slick of bright lip colour to make it clear you’re one of the girls not the boys, and you’re good to go – just ask Barbie!
Tags: chunky specs, girl in glasses, glasses, high prescriptions, plastic frame, specs, varifocals, wear glasses
Posted in Helpfull Info, Humourous | No Comments »
Friday, December 18th, 2009
Opticians are called upon for more services than you would think, so we’ve been reminiscing over the mad, bad, and downright dangerous tasks heaped upon us during our years in Optics….you really couldn’t make it up!
A regular plea around this time of year is for emergency help with dressing up – well would you expect to see Santa without his cute little specs? We’ve supplied vintage and second hand frames for Father Christmas, numerous Harry Potter fancy dress outfits, Dr Who, that chap in the wheelchair in Little Britain and Eric Morecambe. Then there are historical re-enactments, the Sealed Knot, and an Elvis look-alike who was here to do a gig and had forgotten his shades. All of this takes many hours scrabbling around our archives, and trawling the net for pictures so we hand out the right thing.

Santa in Vintage Specs
Then there are the emergency situations where people lose or forget their specs. We’ve had then run over, eaten by dogs, put through the washing machine, and wrapped up in a present and then not found until Boxing Day! With so much to think about people do this kind of thing and then are desperate for specs so they can see what they’re carving at Christmas lunch.
Our other favourite is fanatics who know exactly what they want. We’ve sourced snooker frames as an ingenious present for a fan, and tracked down the exact frame that Heston Blumenthal wears for a wife who knew her husband loved them. We found a vintage Gucci for a lady who wanted to replace her beloved five year old pair, and hand glazed an antique tortoiseshell frame for a chap who had always wanted to wear them.
These jobs are always urgent of course, and we end up running down to the Post Office or even dropping them off ourselves if it’s local. All part of the service, and part of what makes our job fun. Santa would be proud of us for bringing our own little hint of Christmas magic!
Tags: Christmas magic, cute little specs, desperate for specs, help with dressing up, Heston Blumenthal, Santa, second hand frames for Father Christmas
Posted in Humourous | No Comments »
Monday, November 23rd, 2009
We have a few spectacle wearers around the office here at the Internet Glasses Company, and their spec wearing anecdotes often come up in conversation. So here are a few of our favourites – any of them ring a bell with you?!
Steve – Technician – I started wearing glasses when I was fifteen. This was not a good age, and not good for my confidence when added to my brace and my lack of control of my suddenly gangly limbs. (Sounds gorgeous!) I trod on them just before a really important football match, and as I was only on the team because they were desperate I had to act fast. I used some superglue to stick the lens back in. This had a dramatic effect, the lens went frosted and the frame got stuck to my left eyebrow. I nearly passed out from the fumes, and got hit by the ball because I couldn’t see out of the left side. I had to spend two hours waiting in casualty to have the frame removed, and had a bald eyebrow for weeks.
Lucy – Dispenser – I got some sunglasses made up when I worked for one of the multiple opticians. They were dead trendy huge Versace frames, and the workshop did tell me the frame was not ideal for my prescription, but I got them anyway. I wore them all the time, even when it wasn’t sunny. One day I wore them on the train, and this way hot guy kept looking at me. I was really excited until I got to work and discovered that one of the black lenses was still in the case. I’d spent all morning with one black lens and one totally clear. I started driving to work after that.
Charlie – Admin – I’m a disaster with my glasses. I went to Scotland to be best man at a wedding and forgot my reading specs. I had to give the speech wearing some pink leopard print ready readers that I borrowed off the bride’s mother. A lens popped out of my first pair of varifocals and I put it back in, then had blinding headaches all day. When I took them back to the optician he told me I’d put the lens in upside down. I left my photochromics on the windowsill one afternoon, and half of one lens got baked black in the sun. I then stuck them on to drive into town, and had one clear lens and one half coloured for about four hours. It was never quite the same again!
Sue – Admin – I had an old car with a really rubbish heater, and I always wore gloves to drive. One morning I reached up to wipe a smudge off the lens and got my glove caught on one of the screws, just as I had to get through the traffic lights. I had to stop in the middle of the junction to extricate myself, and ended up negotiating it with a bright red glove dangling off my specs.
So there you go – even us experts have our spectacular disasters! Anyone got any they’d like to share with us? Go on – mailing us will make us feel so much better!
Tags: Internet Glasses Company, spec wearing anecdotes, spectacle wearers, Versace frames
Posted in Helpfull Info, Humourous | No Comments »
Monday, September 28th, 2009
We all know that times are hard, and even if green shoots are appearing they’re taking their time in blossoming forth! During the credit crunch every job has to be fought for, so can anything give you the extra edge over your competitors? Well surprisingly, we might just have a suggestion for you……
Specsavers recently commissioned a survey to find out whether wearing glasses makes you a more favourable candidate in the eyes of employers. Now we all know that spec wearers have an image of maybe being a little bit more of a brain box, a bit geeky, a bit more studious. We all have that picture in mind of the school swot in oversized specs earnestly giving all the answers in class. Could it be true that the image still rings true?

Bright child in the class with all the answers!
Apparently the answer is yes! 68% of employers think that spec wearers are more intelligent and can be trusted, and as they apparently give a better first impression this could be the clincher in an interview. We blogged about this a while ago, the fact that in the workplace anything that gives you that edge is worthwhile, so this may be the time to ditch the contact lenses and return to your glasses. Just steer clear of too much bling and make sure they are suitable for your new workplace.

Glasses get the job
Glasses will be the first thing people notice about you, so make sure they’re sparkling clean and fashionable. Get online and find a trendy pair from as little as £9.99. www.TheInternetGlassesCompany.co.uk. Even if you don’t actually have a prescription then you can order specs with clear lenses, and no-one will be any the wiser – they’ll just think you are!
Tags: clincher in an interview, favourable candidate, Just the Job
Posted in Helpfull Info, Humourous, Uncategorized | No Comments »
Tuesday, August 25th, 2009
In order to save you from the same fate as the unfortunates we’re going to tell you about now, we’re going to share some stories to make you think, so have a successful speccy Summer!
We knew the heat was on last week when the temperatures soared, but we’ve never had this problem before – a lady mailed us to order some glasses, which were urgent due to a calamity on Tuesday – she left her plastic frame on the dashboard of the car all afternoon. the frame ‘went all bendy around the edges” one lens fell out on a gravel car park and she trod on the other one!!
Two different clients squashed their glasses – without cases – into bags and the frames snapped in the middle. Remember that glasses are not flat, they are curved!! With some frames there is a big space between the folded sides and the front. Shove them in a pocket and they’ll flatten and ultimately break – why are we telling you this – it’s really good for business!!
One young lady had a few too many Pimms at a BBQ, tried to take the same contact lens out twice (ouch!) damaged her cornea and has had to order specs as she can’t wear her lenses at the moment. A chap in charge of the school PTA BBQ had a few beers (well it is thirsty work) fell over on the way home, and has no idea where the specs went…..hope they didn’t end up in a burger bun!
Usually a couple of pairs go over board at this time of year, and some are lost in lost luggage. We will supply insurance quotes if you are in need of them!! Mail us for details. You are often covered with house contents if for instance the dog eats them, although the vet bill is another matter….
Tags: contact lens, glasses, plastic frame, speccy
Posted in Humourous | No Comments »
Sunday, July 19th, 2009
With our passion for all things related to glasses, lenses, sight, and eye health, we like to think we have a pretty encyclopaedic knowledge of our little world. Eye myths are an interesting one to take a look at……
Eyes – the gateway to our inner selves, mystical organs that can mesmerise, hypnotise, overflow with emotional tears or freeze an opponent with a glacial stare. Eyes convey so much of what we feel, that it’s no wonder they are celebrated, feared, and analysed.
The evil eye is a concept that appears in many forms in several different cultures.
Can a magical eye curse it’s victims with a gaze? Or if you allow your covetous stare to linger too long on a person, or your neighbours livestock, can you then cause them harm? The evil eye is often thought to cause harm by drying out, desiccating or withering it’s victim – but you’re ok if you’re a fish, as they’re thought to be immune!
The third or inner eye is an interesting concept that appears in some spiritual traditions. It is the doorway that leads to the inner being and states of higher consciousness (and you thought a pint or two was the way to manage that!) and it’s often associated with clairvoyance and out of body experiences. Do we all have it? Could we develop the capacity to use it? Seers are those who use this extra sense.
So if you suffer from the green eyed monster, or next time you flash those baby blues, think a little more about the mythical, magical beauty of eyes, and of course the very least you can do is choose a really stunning piece of eye wear to frame those windows to your soul…….
Tags: body experiences, clairvoyance, Eye Health, Eye myths, eye wear, glasses, higher consciousness, inner eye
Posted in Humourous | No Comments »
Monday, May 11th, 2009
This summer we’re all going Star Trekking – glued to our seats thanks to Simon Pegg and Zachary Quinto in the newest take on an old favourite. So if we’re thinking futuristic and techno, what’s happening in the world of optics?
Spectacle lenses constantly evolve, because as technology moves on in leaps and bounds, so do the products. If you are very long or short sighted, you do not have to suffer the weight and bad cosmetics of thick, heavy lenses. High density, machine thinned lenses reduce the bulk of the lens, even if your prescription is high.
Glasses frames change every season, a fashion item that serves a purpose – you can look good and see well! Space age materials such as titanium and stainless steel make for thin, light, strong frames. Plastics improve all the time too – the stuff used in the 1950s was flammable and went a funny yellow colour! Thankfully times have changed. Plastics come in all sorts of colours and finishes, from plain and simple to bejewelled and engraved.
If you’re still not convinced by glasses, you could opt for contact lenses – which can now be worn for a day, a week, or a month, with simple, cheap cleaning solutions. You can sleep in them, swim in them, and apparently chop onions without tears! Or if that’s still not techno enough for you, you can have your eyes lasered – suitable for a huge percentage of patients nowadays.
So, we may not be able to beam ourselves up yet, but times are changing and will continue to so. Check out opticians websites and keep up with the future of optics.
Tags: chop onions without tears, contact lenses, eyes lasered, glasses frames, machine thinned lenses, opticians website, optics, prescription, Simon Pegg, spectacle lenses, Star Trekking, titanium, Zachary Quinto
Posted in Celebrity, Helpfull Info, Humourous | No Comments »
Saturday, May 2nd, 2009
I’m really enjoying buying my glasses online, because up until the net optician appeared on the scene I had a very expensive hobby – buying new prescription lenses because I kept scratching the ******* things!!! I just hope that some of you out there have done it and it’s not just me…….
When I was little my specs were changed every six months, so they were the type of NHS specials that Jarvis Cocker would kill for. I was before my time with the Jack Duckworth look due to the permanent lumps of very sticky plaster holding the arms on. Lenses were not anti-scratch then, and it showed! I gouged them on twigs in the garden, by using them to dig my favourite car out of the sandpit, (oops!) on the pavement when I fell over in them, and on the zip of my Mum’s cardie.
I put them in my cricket bag with a matchbox, my school bag with a metal ruler, and then the spare pair got wrecked after our holiday in the box with the shells I’d collected. I also discovered that if you try and remove the scratches with your Mum’s nail file it really doesn’t help…..
Nowadays I have a scratch resistant layer on my glasses. Please note the word resistant – it doesn’t help if you put your car keys in your pocket with them, or your dog runs off with them and his little puppy teeth find them soothing to chew. It helps with everyday wear and tear though, and now I’m shopping at the online optician I don’t have the expense or the embarrassment!
Tags: anti-scratch, cricket bag, glasses, glasses online, Jack Duckworth, Jarvis Cocker, net optician, NHS, online optician, prescription lenses, scratch resistant layer, specs
Posted in Celebrity, Humourous, Shopping Online | No Comments »
Sunday, April 19th, 2009
After years of glasses abuse and spending half my time in the Opticians, waiting for my glasses to be repaired or going in to collect ones I’ve discovered a whole new world – thank you online optician for ending years of torment……
I got glasses when I became short sighted at age twelve. I’d been squinting for a while and my dad was in such despair over my lack of skills on the cricket pitch that he was willing to try anything. A trip to the Optician and then came the news that every kid dreads – you are now officially a geek and target for stray footballs.
At school my glasses got sat on, eaten by the dog, left on buses, crunched when I put them in my trainers for safe keeping. (You can guess the rest. To add injury to insult I cut my toe on the broken lens.) One pair fell overboard from a ferry on a day trip to France, one pair fell out of the door pocket in the car and Mum drove over them.
At work my cool rimless specs got squashed when some other short sighted idiot to vain to wear their glasses put a box on them. I left one pair on top of the car, and a girlfriend took another because she liked the frames so much.
When I discovered online glasses the world became a better place. I got five pairs, not much dearer than the ones I left on the car, and now I’m never without spex. I also don’t have the indignity of glasses repaired with sellotape, plasters, safety pins, garden twine or Blu-tak. Now I just need to remember where I put them….
Tags: broken lens, glasses abuse, online glasses, online optician, Optician, Opticians, rimless specs, short sighted
Posted in Humourous | No Comments »